The Wolf Lord’s Lady – v1 Illustrations

Hi, all!

Thanks to those donating ko-fi for me, I finally bought The Wolf Lord’s Lady, volume I! ???

I apologize because I haven’t translated the later chapters yet, so now I came bearing the first volume’s illustrations instead!

Before I get to it, please, please, please support the author if you can afford it by buying the book. It’s easy in bookwalker; you only need to make an account and choose Paypal to check out, and done! Besides, you’re going to get coins that you can use to buy another book, no questions asked. Here’s the link to The Wolf Lord’s Lady series!

Presented to you the beautiful, beautiful artworks that’s going to make you want to reread the chapters.

Read moreThe Wolf Lord’s Lady – v1 Illustrations

The Wolf Lord’s Lady – 20

Read from the start (kudarajin)


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20. Thus it begins, you and me

“My lady.”

I turn around towards the voice that called me. The hair that’s carefully combed cascades to my cheek.

“Isidore-sama.”

The person who showed up from the hallway’s direction was Isidore. I then thought about that time when we waited for him following us.

“I’m fine with ‘my lamb’ too, though?”
“Ugh…… Please, spare me.”

His flinch made me giggle.
At last, both him and Kaid called me ‘my lady’ like they used to.
“A long time ago, I’m in your debt,” was the only thing that Kaid offered as explanation. Thinking about his age, that long time ago was the time when he was barely a child, but he slippery dodged. Everyone came asking about it, but he weathered all questions and only said, “It was a very, very long time ago.
I’m no longer wearing a working uniform now. It wasn’t a long, lacy-laden dresses like a long time ago either, but I’m wearing a one-piece-like dress. It’s light blue.
I’m not permitted to go back to be a maid. When outsiders aren’t looking, we’ll continue acting as usual, so please at least please spare us from returning as a maid, was what Caron and her co-workers petitioned for.
At first, I thought being resented was a given, since a newcomer like me stole their precious lord, but I was bewildered when they were so amiable. It was such an anticlimax.
Like Jasmine, who said, “It’s a great help if the master knows the hardships of being a maid!”, or Samua, who said, “The head butler has been crying happily, being in a high spirit everyday, so the job has been easy,” or Caron who said, “A Mistress who has the servants on her side is strong, you know, so defeat Master in one swoop.”
I’m really glad that people are so amiable, but, Caron, I’m not really here to wage war with Kaid, though?

The festival was over, the mansion sent off the honored guests, and finally returned to its peaceful atmosphere. I did say “return”, but the time is pressing for another event now.

Kaid decided to return here to sleep normally. Until now, he stayed at a building that looked like a fort near his office, but from now on, it seems that he’ll properly use the lord’s mansion.
That’s related to what he wants to do from now on.
Kaid has been thinking about many things about this time around, he has started to allocate the tasks he has been doing on his own to those around him, gradually.
Joblin said that as long as he was here, it would suffice. In other words, if he alone was gone, everything would collapse. Kaid said that it had no difference to dictatorship.
Now, little by little, Kaid assigns his tasks to the others.

“Is Kaid available?”
“No, he was just summoned somewhere else. He would return in a while, I’m sure, should I tell him that you are here?”
“Ah, no…… It’s fine to tell you instead. Can we talk for a moment?”

His voice frowns slightly. I nod and turn to look behind me.
When I turn around, looking at Jasmine behind me, she could guess what’s in my mind. With a grin, she bows her head.

“I’m sorry, Jasmine.”
“Don’t be~ Well then, Isidore-sama, please excuse me.”

Isidore waited until Jasmine’s figure was gone from his sight, then started to speak.

“I’m returning home tomorrow.”
“Yes, I was told so. I will send you off as well.”

The honored guests and others were already gone while I was bedridden with fever. That was actually longer than expected, though. Despite that kind of uproar, the original agenda of the festival which was supposed to have passed were still around, so I must be thankful.

“Have you known about what Kaid is doing right now?”
“Yes.”

He’s gradually allocating his tasks to others. The job he has been doing on his own until now is impossibly excessive.

“……The succession won’t be what it used to be, huh?”
“……Yes.”

I knew what he was trying to say.
Because this topic can’t be spoken in the hallway, I open the nearest door and lead us in. It’s only a small guest room, but it’s messy with various packages.

“Is he trying to get rid of the feudal lord system?”
“I think, he feels that it will be a good thing. ……I think so, too.”

It’s not going to happen in an instant. It’s about sometime far in the future.
However, someday, there will come a day when a lord is no longer necessary. Whether it’s a land where a single lord can make or break it, or a land where a single lord fattens up himself, they are both warped.

“……Did you understand what that means? Other fief’s lords, even the king, will surround you as enemies.”
“……That’s true.”

A land that can hold itself without a lord. Developing a similar system to a parliament, where a single person’s absence won’t affect the whole system. That’s what I want to build. Kaid said that if we could make it so that a single person wouldn’t have to be burdened, or be able to burden themselves alone, that’ll be good.
That, however, means that even a lord’s presence is unnecessary. It will shake the very core of the current system. The change of Laius won’t remain in Laius only.
It’s not about changing the lord. If it comes to the point where the lord becomes unnecessary, the lord from other fiefs will surely oppose it. If the summit of that system is deemed unnecessary, and the idea is spread in that land, there’s even a possibility where it will shake even the existence of the king.
Kaid didn’t say that it wasn’t necessary. A person who holds the position of responsibility is absolutely necessary. However, people turn anxiety into malice. To change that unintentional malice, the titles have to change. It meant that the lords and the king are unnecessary. The idea will possibly spread.

“……No matter what we do, we have a lot of time. Laius itself is vast on its own. In ten years, or twenty years, even beyond that, we want to try to change a lot of things, that’s what we decided.”
“Even if you’ll accomplish that far, it will probably revert to what it was. The populace is going to look for a man to bear the burnt. Just the slightest violation from the parliament, the inability to bring the expected result, will make them hold grudge to you two who change the system, or demand to revert to the old feudal system. Then, when the lord makes the slightest violation, they’ll demand to revert again to the parliament system.”
“That might be the case. The path chosen by someone else is the easiest to take. However, it’s suffocating to live without the ability to choose. Isn’t it sad to live without knowing the freedom to choose?”

I’m still learning, too. Right now, I’m learning about a lot of things from Kaid. About Laius, about feudal lord, Kaid taught me without holding back. My head even heated up from all the complicated matters. He taught me about the helpless, fruitless, piercing decisions to make.
No matter how many years it takes, I must learn. Not just the knowledge, but how to properly use the wisdom.

“……The two of you must selflessly sacrifice a lot more things, even your peaceful lives.”
“That’s true. I’ll tell those things to Kaid.”
“I’m telling this to you, too.”
“Oh, my. But I am terribly selfish.”

After I said that, Isidore made a face that looked like he refrained from telling me that I was still young. I’m sure that the next lord couldn’t be too readable from facial expressions. However, we aren’t in a public space. Isidore and I aren’t in a relationship where we would spy out each other’s internal affairs either.
Having this kind of person by my side, I’m grateful from the bottom of my heart. Living without lying is, surely, a very blessed life.

“For me, no matter what happens, I’ll be together with Kaid until the very end. This time around, I’ll bear in mind to do anything I can to stay married with him throughout this life. To be liked by the people, to keep Laius from its nightmare, I want to learn, to know, and to choose…… However, in the worst case, if the world becomes his enemy, at that time, I will betray the world and become the demon with him. It’ll be different to becoming the demon back in the past where I saw, heard, and knew nothing. This time I will properly turn into the demon with full awareness.”
“Kaid will definitely never allow that thing to happen, though.”
“That’s why, so that he won’t be able to let me go in the middle of it, I need to gain more wisdom. ……Moreover, I’ll be working hard from now on so that it won’t have to come to that. I’ll be working hard with everyone. There are cruel people. There are people who can’t see beyond the instant profit they could gain. There are also foolish people like me. However, there are also kind, wise, and strong people. There are many kinds of people even just in a single fief. At the very least, Laius already knew the fear of being under someone’s domination, the dread of being ruled under a powerful individual. Laius knew, more than anyone else in this kingdom, the horror of undiminished power.”
“That’s certainly true. In your previous life, it was a necessary reformation, but is it necessary for the two of you now as well?”
“Once this era has passed, people are bound to forget, aren’t they? The pain, the sorrow, as long as the same incident doesn’t happen before their eyes, the masses who live their busy ordinary lives are bound to forget. No one is willing to live only by seeing the sorrow. However, Isidore. We aren’t exactly planning to suffer, you see? Me, Kaid, and even Laius, we are different to what we were fifteen years ago. We can’t become heroes, nor we plan to. We’re just trying to throw a small stone amidst this ever flowing era.”
“……Honestly, the two of you.”

Isidore wryly smiles while shrugging.

“Have you told your story to the maid just now, or the male butler that you’re close with?”
“Once they pass twenty years old and decide to keep working here, I will.”

It was something I decided with Kaid, Caron, and the others.
It’s not that we can’t trust the two of them. It’s simply that, the moment they know, they cannot escape anymore. They’re still too young to be bound. I think if they want to escape, it’s better if they do. Dragging them out of their will is cruel.
We still have the time to wait, I’m sure. Because, you see, we haven’t even started anything yet.

Outside the window, men are passing through while carrying the goods. One of them notices me and waves his hand. I wave back at him while smiling. It seems that Isidore at my side doesn’t realize what’s going on. Ducking his head, he runs as if rushing over. I hope he doesn’t fall over. As I think so, I hear the sound of something huge being toppled over.
I shut my eyes in reflex. Then, I peek on the swaying window towards the outside. The angle doesn’t seem accurate, though, since I cannot see his figure anymore.
What kind of place, I wonder, will this place turn out to be? At least, it won’t be a place where the servants are always nervous and pale.

“My symbol of happiness in Laius is the two of you. Do you remember? I was lost in the garden, looking for our rendezvous point.”
“Rendezvous…… Yes, I remember.”

I gloss it over with a light cough.

“You made a flower crown, then put it on top of Kaid’s…… of Helt’s head. Helt sulked in embarrassment. You laughed. In my childish mind, I already thought that it was beautiful. I don’t know any sight as beautiful as that. I thought, that was happiness, that was peace, a lord existed to protect that sight. But when I opened the lid, I saw people precious to me crying, only the lord’s family was singing happily. Kaid clenched his teeth, grind them, moved on only by saying that it was as expected from the fief’s lord. They thought that whatever happened could be pushed to your family. That somehow things would be just fine if things were left to your family. Because, you see, it always worked that way.”

“I will become an admirable lord. Then I will save my lady and her family!”

The boy laughed while saying that. Leaving a trace of that time, growing up splendidly.
Even though things won’t stay the same. But, still.

“Therefore, I fully supported the cause to erase all of you, the fief’s lord.”

I’m sure, just as the same, everything has changed.
He was a serious child. Serious and kind. His sadness must have been really deep. And he was scared too, I’m sure. How much pain did his tender heart bear alone, I wonder?

“Personally, though. I agree to the abolition of the lord system. There’s a limit to what someone can bear alone. It’s great if someone capable could succeed, but people are born different. Moreover, there’s the inability to give birth to the same person, which makes the impracticality of using the same system inevitable. A hero can be born. But the same hero can’t be born again. It’s not like heroes can be born in succession either. In which case, it’s a given that the omnipresent system is impossible. I’m not saying that the masses cannot become a hero. Rather, it’s about the lord being demanded to be a hero. Before making someone into a hero, if we rack the wisdom of a hundred ordinary people, a good idea should be born, even if it’s a little, right? In that case, it’ll be better if the whole population can be involved. It may need a longer time, but that’s everyone’s responsibility. It’s good if everyone can share the responsibility. If a lord has to be troubled, decided, and taken responsibility by himself, the population would only be a burden. By relying on everyone, we will have the resolution to face any result together. If no one wants to take the responsibility of the decision and outcome in the fief’s matters, then it’s better to be demolished.”
“Kaid does make bold decisions, but you also say outrageous things without hesitation, don’t you?”
“I’m just huge on nepotism. Anyone would prioritize his own happiness than a complete stranger’s, you know? Moreover, we’re supposed to kill our hearts for the sake of the fief’s population, but they take that as a given. No one will ever kill their heart for our sake, nor move into action for that. That’s why, at least, I decide to think, kill my heart, and act for myself.”

Isidore holds his chest with one hand, bowing down.

“I can’t give you the promise of the lord of Gimmi, but as an individual, I vow to be the ally of the two of you until my last breath. Please, my lady, take care of Kaid. I saw his selfishness in that cliff for the very first time. He threw everything away to run to your side, made a move for his own sake for the first time since he became the lord…… Please, this time around, live a happy and peaceful life.”
“And you as well, Isidore. You can’t become unhappy either, you know?”

After saying that, Isidore lifted his head up and winked at me. That joking face looks so messy that it looks cute.

“My family is well, my friends are well, the person I admired has returned. I’m happy, you know?”
“Oh my, how wonderful! I wonder who it is. Is it someone I knew of?”
“Kaaaid, I can’t saaay .”

Cheerfully clasping the hands together, Isidore bursts into laughter and turns around in exaggerated sigh. When I look at his back, moving out of my reach, I realize that Kaid is already here since who knows when. He leans on the open door and chuckles.

“Can he bear to tell that easily? He hasn’t even told me yet.”

When I saw Kaid laughing gleefully, I became happy. I already held out my hand, and he picked it up all at once, swiftly pressing a kiss to the fingertips. Our matching rings reflect the light. It’s not the sight I’m used to, so I feel the tingles, somehow.

“I’m home, my lady.”
“Welcome back, Kaid.”

He’s bending down, so I can reach his forehead to return the kiss, while Isidore visibly shrugged.

“Now, now, this bug is going to disappear. Kaid couldn’t stop pestering me to go home sooner either.”
“You’re only free from Gimmi for one month anyway. I received an urging from there, you know.”
“That’s because Father is desperate to be succeeded by me.”
“…………You jerk, did you come here because you ran away from that?”
“That’s just because Mother said that she wanted to retire by traveling around the world. Wouldn’t you be upset if you’re in my shoes? I’m here for my active duty, too.”

While shaking his hand, Isidore went out of the room.
Kaid let out a deep sigh. However, in his face, he expresses a wry smile as if saying that the guy is a handful. Somehow, Kaid really spoils Isidore. He really had a good friend. I’m really glad that in these fifteen years, there’s Isidore in Kaid’s side, always.

I don’t know since when, but Kaid’s room has become filled with nothing but books.
Since Kaid never really uses this room until now, there’s barely nothing, except for the basic furniture. However, now he comes back with a massive amount of materials. Rather than saying that Kaid moves back his bedroom here, it’s more like he moves his office here. I finally understand what Caron told me before.
The mansion is undergoing various repairs as well. This place should be surrounded like a fort too.
But, with this, whenever there’s something I don’t understand from my night studies, it’s easier to borrow a book. It feels like I’m stealthily obtaining a bargain.

“Hey, Kaid. When Kaid isn’t around, what should I do if I want to borrow some books from this room? Is there any place that I must not touch?”
“If it’s for you, my lady, even the access to the vault room is open.”
“So you have something like a vault room?”

Even if I look around inside the room, I can’t find the carpet. Kaid, who said ‘yeah’ to my tilting head, makes a small beckoning gesture. I scoot closer to him and he points at the spot below the painting leaning on the wall.
Then, he suddenly kicked that spot. With a heavy and lumping sound, the wall caves in. I thought it was smashed broken, but when he hooks his finger and pulls something there, the wall at our side is moving. Beyond the wall, a large iron door calmly awaits.

“It’ll open with a password and a key. This is the only key, but next time, I’ll get my lady’s copy ready.”
“No, that’s unnecessary! I can’t possess something that important!”
“If somehow this mansion is under siege, this is the safest place, so please escape here. It can cram up to three people.”
“So it’s a shelter……”
“For the time being, it was built to be the vault room, though. Next time, I’ll think about how to open up a ventilation from the inside.”

He enters the password that I repeat again and again in my head so that I won’t forget. There’s no way I can write it down, so I have to remember it. Looking at me, Kaid makes a smile. I know he’s not a person who’ll laugh at my bad memorization, but I feel uncomfortable.

“Now then, it’s already open, so.”

The condition to open a heavy looking iron door makes me frown. Kaid notices that and leans down.

“My lady?”
“I wonder if I can open this door. Perhaps I can if I train like Kaid?”
“……My lady is adorable no matter how you look like, but if you look like me, I’ll probably cry a little. Besides, my lady, your hair color has changed, hasn’t it?”
“It seems so. It looks more like the past, somehow.”

Reaching out his hand to touch my hair, his eyes narrowed as if it was on the verge on breaking.
The fodder-like brown color has become lighter as if it starts turning to blonde. I was told that my face looked changing too. I think, that’s because I’m eating properly, making my face look rounder.
The head chef, noticing that I make the effort to increase my meal little by little, also put on a lot of effort. The decoration that looks cute-ish keeps adding up. When I see that the stew looks like a poisonous soup with skulls stirred in grudge, I can’t forget that those are carrots, carved to look like cute small birds. I wonder what kind of small bird it was made to look like. Gathering up the courage to ask, I got the answer that it was supposed to be a small, pink bird. How they turned into skulls was a mystery to everyone.

I want to be able to do things, little by little. In my study and meals, also, if I can be honest, in sword practicing. If I can become more careful, Caron and Jasmine promised to take me to go shopping with them in the town. A festival is coming soon for the girls to give chocolates to her crush, I want to choose it with them. I want to try the things I haven’t done yet. I want to do things together with the person I love. I want to play with my friends, talk with them. I want to run, I want to enjoy sweets. I want to braid my hair, pick colorful clothes, and do make ups too.
Also, just a little bit, I want to try getting into a fight with him. I’ve had enough of a fist fight, but I want to try reconciling with him. But, I truthfully don’t want to feel sad or make him feel sad, so I don’t want to do it as much as possible.

Inside the vault room that he led me to, there are shelves attached to thick iron walls, mainly to story important documents and keys. Rather than things that could make money, they look more like things that are essential to manage a fief.
Let’s treat this well too. While nervously looking around, I saw one distinguishable spot. It’s a small and cute looking glass box. With flower decorations, it’s put on top of a piece of clothing, unlike others which are littering around.

“This is?”
“Ah.”

I don’t know if I can touch it or not, so I ask by gesturing with my palm. Kaid, following the line of my sight, jumped in a startle. Seeing that, I also jumped.

“Wh, what? Is it something I couldn’t ask? If it is, I’ll forget about it right away.”
“Ah, no, that’s.”

Looking at Kaid becoming incoherent and drenched in cold sweat. I feel flustered too. If it’s something that important, so much that he doesn’t want me know, I’m really sorry to carelessly ask about that.

“It’s fine, I already forgot about it! I already forgot what I ate for dinner yesterday, and even the cute dog you drew on top of the pancake to erase the morning resentment is way forgotten!”
“Even if you don’t become forgetful from being that flustered…… That thing in the morning, if you forget it, that’s great. No wonder everyone said that they had no appetite back then.”

Kaid pressed his forehead, but immediately shook his head. Then, slowly, as if holding a really fragile article, he took the glass box with both hands.
It looks like he’s going to put it right in front of my eyes, so I shyly fix my gaze upon it.

“Please open it.”
“……May I?”
“Yes. But please don’t laugh?”

Kaid holds up with both hands a tiny, cute-looking box, softly caressing it. The box that was kept inside the cool vault room was as cold as ice.
So that he wouldn’t scar it in one per ten thousands chance, he uncovers the lid very carefully. Just what did he put inside? While my heart thumping hard, I peered inside, and felt let down instantly.

A small paper, ribbon, light yellow paper, and handkerchief.

If the handkerchief isn’t there, I would’ve thought that they are trashes, but why are they kept so securely, as if they’re treasures? I tilt my head, but I can’t look away. It interests me, somehow. I think I have seen them somewhere before……
I lift my head in an instant. Kaid doesn’t say anything. Yet he gave me a slight nod, which confirms my thoughts.
My eyes and nose are burning up. I couldn’t resist the heat from travelling up to my eyes.

“I’m more skillful now.”
“You’ve been skillful since that time, though.”
“That’s a lie. The flower was slanted and the cookies were slightly burnt.”
“I no longer lie to you, my lady. I’m looking at it everyday, but I can’t tell where the slanted part is, and I hid the cookies from everyone so I would be the only one who ate them back then.”

I control my trembling lips, desperately trying to reply. I was really against showing him this kind of pathetic face that I preferred being overturned, but, no matter what, I want to see it.
The letter I wrote in a rush for our rendezvous. The ribbon I used to wrap the cookies that I was too troubled with, so much that I barely made it to our rendezvous. The handkerchief that I was mulling over, because I had no spare if that one ended in failure.
I gave those to you. A very, very long time ago, fifteen years ago that felt just like yesterday, I gave them to you.

Even though you should’ve just thrown them away.
They were being a burden, right? It was really painful, right?
It was better not to hold the things in your arms when you couldn’t go back to them again. You should’ve just thrown them away, lessened your burden, and moved on.
I think of these things, but at the same time, I feel happy too. Really, I’m such a selfish woman.

While thinking that he was such an idiot, I wiped the tears and suddenly realized. I wiped my tears once again, and looked closely into the box to confirm it. However, no matter how many times I look at it, I can’t find it. I even opened the handkerchief, but there was nothing but a slanted flower, swaying as if it could be blown away by the slightest wind.
Kaid keeps gazing at me who is looking for something.

“Hey, Kaid.”
“Yes?”
“My hair?”
“…………”

I’m sure I heard that he took a bunch of my hair, but there’s nothing resembling hair inside this box. Since I have this opportunity, I want to wash that hair at least.
And yet, Kaid somehow avoids my eyes, putting up a futile iron wall.

“……Kaid?”
“……Yes.”
“I won’t be mad, so tell me?”
“Uh…… Yes.”
“My hair, what did you use it for?”
“Huh!?”

My eyes are looking at him, soothing and conveying that it’s okay, I understand.

“Hold on, my lady?”
“I didn’t read in details, but in the book I read a long time ago, there seemed to be a lot of recordings about using hairs in good luck charms. You used it for that, didn’t you?”
“You’re mistaken! In the first place, using hairs for good luck charms is considered black magic, isn’t it?”
“Uhm……”

It’s about a long time ago in the past, and I didn’t exactly plan on getting executed, so I don’t remember that clearly. I only read carefully about love charms. Like, using the hairs of one’s crush to create a paper doll and let it bathe under the full moon’s light, or like, braiding them into a misanga, braided bracelet, putting it against your skin without being noticed by anyone else for a month, or other things.
However, I didn’t remember anything other than the charms would make one’s feelings returned by one’s crush.

“Making a straw doll and inserting the hairs to it.”
“I understand the gist of it from that, but that is done to send a curse.”
“Sticking the hairs into a paper doll and burning it without being seen by anyone.”
“That’s also to put a curse.”
“In the novel I read a long time ago, the main character, a mysterious thief, can turn into a person by eating their hair, or……”
“Eating someone else’s hair needs a considerably strong will power, indeed…… My lady?”
“……I heard this from Jasmine before, but her mom read it in the popular novel when she was a child.”
“…………Well, it might be.”

I wonder if I radiated grief, because Kaid pat my back in return.

“So, then, what kind of charm did you use the hair for?”
“Just the usual kind, a plain protecting charm that I can carry everywhere.”

Inside the pendant that he took from his chest’s pocket, there were three small strands of golden hair. I stared at them without blinking, confirming for once that there were no noticeable dirt on them.

“Kaid.”
“……It’s repulsive to you, after all?”
“I think my hair has no protective effect, actually.”
“I wasn’t looking for the effect.”

I think it’s unfair that Kaid is the only one who has it, so I told him that I wanted his hair too and obtained them from him.
Somewhat limping, Kaid led me out of his vault room. He said that this place could be an evacuation shelter if something bad happened, but I wonder if the tightly shut door can be opened in times of emergency, especially with the door being that heavy, so it will only increase my anxiety. First of all, the way that the very first wall has to be kicked from the side already leaves much doubt. Next time, I’ll definitely ask him to give me a kicking training.

A nice wind blows in from the opened window, caressing my hair as my eyes flutter close. I remember the feeling of looking at a far, faraway town.

“I want to go back to Kayna.”

I heard a loud rattle from Kaid, who was examining the walls’ condition. As I turn around in surprise, I wonder if he’s trying to fix the bent wall, because he smashes the painting frame in his hand.
Kaid wasn’t looking at the pitifully broken frame before dropping the painting.

“Did I, perhaps, do something?”
“A, ah, yes. You just smashed that frame.”
“That frame is nothing of importance.”
“It looks extremely valuable, though……”

Declaring a quite dire condition of the wooden chips as nothing of importance, he quickly paces himself over here. His hands reached out to my shoulders before he realized that there were wooden chips in his hand, which he threw to the back.

“So, uhm……”
“Yes.”

I’m conflicted over continuing or not, but since Kaid has made a waiting stance, I continued. I look at Kaid’s straight-laced back as he stands still, frowning, then I look to the neglected painting on the floor. Somehow it makes me feel a little restless. It’s in a maid’s nature. I want to tidy it up.

“I sent a letter, but as I thought, I want to directly express my gratitude. The orphanage manager is someone who raised and loved me, this kind of an eerily uncute girl who never smiled. Not only was I unpleasant, I was always worrisome. So I thought that I must show my face at least once to express my gratitude.”
“Is that so? In that case, please let me give you company. I also wish to express my gratitude to the person who raised my lady.”
“You’re so busy though, is it okay?”
“The head butler said that I was never free enough to take several days off, even for the honeymoon, so I quickly assign the tasks. I think it’s okay.”
“………………So you’ve been busy for that kind of reason?”
“Well, half of it.”
“It takes half, even.”

I didn’t even know that that kind of motive could occupy half of his reasons.
Oh, well, under the pretext of a medical care, he should decrease the frequency of showing up at work, so even if he allocates the tasks, it shouldn’t be strange.
With a somewhat extremely relieved expression, Kaid tilts his neck. I’m worried if he feels anxious, so I grab Kaid’s hand, but what I got in return was a wry smile.

“I thought you wanted to return home.”
“Home? Ah, that’s right. That place has become my home. Fufu, saying it that way makes me feel the tingles.”

She was truly kind. After all these years, she has grown much older, her body might no longer listen to her anymore, disturbingly. Yet, against all those mischievous children, she never even shown any unpleasant behavior. She was genuinely worried about the child who wished for an unhappiness on her own, without feeling uncomfortable. Even I, who shook away people around me, could notice that.
The wise, kind, and gentle woman.
I think Isidore will like her too.
If there are selfish people, there are people who aren’t. If there are terrible people, the kind ones are also there. There are people who will loudly scream their complaints, but there are also people who will endure and keep believing. There are people who won’t work for themselves, but there are also people who will reach out to support the others.
I can’t say that it’ll become reality unconditionally. Maybe in one generation or two, not something right before us.

I think it’ll be good if Isidore also has his wonderful destined meeting. I truly think so. If he comes into the conclusion of not wishing to succeed his fief, not at the price of sacrificing his whole life, I think that’ll be good too.
If he can choose the path that he won’t regret, that’ll be the best.
I’ll do anything so that there will be a choice for that sake. Not for Isidore the next lord, but for the sake of our precious friend, Isidore.

When I think about Isidore, my forehead gets bumped against and I close my eyes without thinking twice. My hand, which was grasped, somehow had its fingers being intertwined now.

“I’ll be very happy if you can think of this place as your home as well.”
“You’re right. This place is my home, that place is my home too. I have to introduce myself to the orphanage manager. Telling her that my lord-master (dannasama) has become my lord-husband (dannasama).”
“That’s,”
“Then, my master (goshujinsama)?”
“That’s a little too much too.”
“……The-lord-turned-husband (otto)?”
“Just use the usual, please.”
“The one who becomes my lord husband?”
“That’s weird, I feel extremely uncomfortable.”
“The one who became my lord husband?”
“I feel that it strays even further from the usual.”
“What should I call you, then?”
“What should you call me, indeed?”

The corner of eyebrows lowering to the center, Kaid was even more troubled than me. If he has a tail, it’ll probably be lowered while feeling dejected. As I think so, somehow, I burst out laughing.

“Pfft…… Oh, Kaid, it’s funny…… Pff– ahahaha!”
“……Go ahead, you may laugh at me…… Your laughter, it hasn’t changed.”
“P-perhaps so…… Pft…….”
“Unexpectedly, your low funny barrier hasn’t changed either.”

He uses a pouting voice, but the golden eyes gazing down on me look unexpectedly gentle, so much that it makes me blush.
I wonder if he has realized that I lost my ability to laugh, because now Kaid’s lips turn up to a smile. They said yawning is contagious, but laughter seems to have the same effect.
That hard staring makes me tingle, but I don’t want to be separated from him either. Embracing me with an ‘up you go’, his large figure envelops me without leaving gaps. He’s large, warm, and calming me down more than anything, but my heart beats fast at the same time.

“……This time, I will definitely make you happy.”

When the reflective words came, it made me frown. I push his chest away, he let me go without resisting, though his face looks puzzled.

“That’s not good, Kaid. Fix it.”
“Yes?”

I pull both of his grasping hands, tiptoeing to reach his looming face.
Our lips crash together, my lady, he said under his breath.

“Let’s be happy. The two of us. I’ll tell you this, but I cannot be happy by myself. I won’t be. I’m a troublesome woman. Please be prepared.”
“…………Pardon me for that. Let’s become happy, my lady. Together, with me, please be happy.”
“Yes, with my pleasure!”

Gleefully hugging his nape, the arms that encircle my body stays there, embracing me. My toes are dangling in the air, swaying. Albeit twirling in that position, I don’t feel anxious at all. I have no fear of being dropped, and if I stay this way, I feel happier.

“My lady, I wish to correct one thing.”
“What is it~?”

Without realizing it, Kaid was already holding the back of my knee, turning me into a sitting-like position in his arms.
Putting my hands on his shoulders, I’m looming over him in puzzlement. Those golden eyes are too dazzling, but I’m still looking at them, narrowing my eyes in spellbound.

“That is, not with you as the troublesome woman, but as an adorable lady, you know?”
“You’re the only one who thinks that, Kaid.”
“If not, I’ll be more troubled. Also, I’ll tell you this: I’m a truly troublesome man, so prepare yourself.”
“……Somehow, when you’re the one who said that, I feel a little afraid.”
“Yes, please be more afraid of me.”

Kaid grins.
However, it’s not the gentle smile he showed just before, it’s a disturbing smiling face with his canine tooth peeking from his lips.

“Anyhow, all men are wolves.”

Saying that, the wolf lord laughs towards his most precious person in the world.


RAWS by Morino Ion

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Translator’s Notes: 

So this is not the first I translated, but certainly the first I ended. Thanks again for kudarajin for picking this wonderful story up and letting it be known to the English-speaking world.

That being said… What’s with the length of the chapters?! I was so used to UPC’s 3000+ characters that my eyes wavered when I saw 10,000 to 6,000 to 12,000 (!) to 13,000 (!!?) character-count. I wanna split this into two, at first, but I finished the latter half before the first half. ….I’m such a genius.

I have a mixed feeling about the talk about politics here. In a way, it gives them a fulfilling future, but I wish it’d be foreshadowed in the other chapters instead of being thrown in the last one… …and making it long af.

But I digress. My tears are dry now, Shirley and Kaid have gotten their happy endings. Cheers, guys, cheers! (Edit: There’s a dozen and possibly more chapters in the epilogue. Please wait until I translate them!)

~isecai.wordpress.com~

The Wolf Lord’s Lady – 19

Read from the start (kudarajin)


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19. The return of you and me

We stopped once at Kolkia town, bathing in hot water, washing the dirt, and adjusting our outfits.
The town that was cleared away from the black, mourning clothes, adjusted itself for the festival’s preparation. Each house was adorned with many flowers, the decoration chiming from the wind that I couldn’t tell whether they were made of colored glass or gems, both adults and children were in high spirit.
I wouldn’t have expected that the black clothes were hanging to cover these decorations. The ash-colored town is completely buried in many colors instead, just like a flower field in spring.

However, as much as I regret it, I can’t see Kolkia town properly.
The reason was Kaid; as soon as the news that he was well started to spread, he must return to the mansion as fast as possible. Moreover, I am also to return with him.
If that was the only reason, there wouldn’t be any problem to gaze outwards from the window, but an incident occurred. After the hot bath, I broke into fever, had my wounds treated, and had a medicine to reduce the fever. At that point, it was still good, there was no problem at all. However, the antidote that I got at the end, was the problem.
I tasted something sweet at first. Thinking that the antidote was unexpectedly easy to drink, a misunderstanding, I’m sure it was for protecting me.
I even became unable to tell if it was bitter, spicy, hot, or cold. Moreover, I literally felt separated from my senses. You see, the sweets that Kaid carried all the time, for some reasons, could it be that they weren’t for feeding hungry kids, but to cleanse his palate from the antidote’s taste? It was a huge shock when he poured the antidote into my mouth. I couldn’t even tell the taste. It was a shock of that scale.
The doctor spoke that consuming it raw might be too harsh with its taste. Also, he had tried to improve the taste for a long time now, but somehow, after all these years, the taste had become even more potent.
Turning his face away, he must have recalled the moment he said that. That was not an exaggeration, joke, or anything as such; that was the reality I couldn’t escape from.

 

 

“Sobs…….”

I feel that the shocking taste still remains in my mouth, so I spit out the discomfort while groaning. Every time my consciousness returns, I drink some tea and get some sweets, but the discomfort is so stubborn that it’s scary.

Inside the carriage, I’m lying flat on my right side, where my chest doesn’t hurt. There’s a light, warm blanket draped over me.
While the carriage was hurrying, out of concern for the impacts, the view from the slightly open window was too rushed, but it was quiet when we started dozing off.
Yes, we.
In my one-sided field of vision, I saw Kaid sitting across me. With his arms crossed, he even snored a little, and I stare at him absentmindedly. Different from me who dozed off all the time, when we passed the town, Kaid rode a horse, displaying their lord’s well-being to the townspeople, easing their anxiety. Starting from the place he passed through, the mourning ended. Right now, all across Laius, the news of the lord’s safety must have spread.
The lifted curtain didn’t say “Liberation Festival”, it was “Wolf Resurrection Festival” instead. Kaid, who worried about whether it would be established as such from now on, was really cute, but that’s a secret.

 

 

Though he must have been way more exhausted than I am, his posture never revealed that exhaustion, not even a word of it. As a lord, he’s done splendidly. However, as a human being, I wonder if it’s alright.
If Isidore is here, he would have said something, but even though we set together to the mansion, he’s not in the carriage with us. He was riding a horse instead with the other soldiers. I know that since we marched in hurry, the number of carriages was kept to a minimum. Still, even though it would be better if we were in the same carriage, he said “absolutely no way” without any hesitation. Tilting my head and looking at Kaid, who responded by saying that “if I were in Isidore’s shoes, I would have declined too”. I wanted to cry to their straight faces, had I been snoring too loud!? They both strongly denied it, but I was too anxious to sleep on my back from then on.

While listening to the clattering wheels as they spun, I’m still staring at Kaid absentmindedly. His eyelashes are unexpectedly long, though unlike a girl. It’s just mysterious. Mysterious, interesting, strange, so much that I want to get closer to look at it, until I can tell every lash apart, until he feels ticklish or itchy. It’s a luxurious problem for me, whose relationship with him is close enough to be forgiven for it, something embarrassing and to be proud of, making me feel as ticklish as I thought.

When I put a blanket on him until it covers his mouth, his golden eyes fluttered upon without saying anything. He blinks twice, three times, searching until he finds my eyes, then smiles tenderly. It drew the blanket up until it covers his nose.

“My lady? Do you need to drink?”

I wryly smile unconsciously.

“That is what I said when you were awake just now. Great job, Kaid.”
“I can sleep along the way, so it’s not that much.”

Does Kaid say something like that in this harsh trip, because it’s his thoughtful act, or because he’s too used to his rigorous training? I thought it was both, maybe, let’s catch up with him this time.

 

“Where are we, now?”
“Please wait a bit.”

Taking his head out from the window, Kaid confirmed by looking at the immediate surrounding. He took out the map from his chest, then spread it in front of me. If it’s raised, we’ll stop instead, so, there’s no other option but to open it while laying down. Making it easy for me to see, folding both of his knees on the floor, Kaid’s face is close. I look at him more than the map that he explains by pointing his finger, so I turn downwards, feeling flustered.
The place he pointed to me was further along the way than I thought. At this rate, we’ll be arriving at the mansion when the night falls today.

“That’s surprisingly fast.”
“If we go in a straight line, it’s to be expected.”

Perhaps he’s right. Since we don’t need to pass through the road of “landslide  blockade”, “washed away bridge”, or “sunken village”. Thoroughly, it looks like a detour. Still, Joblin has a fit body. He must have chosen to cross the path that was completely safe from the beginning. The narrow paths and those with unsafe bridges were used, so it wasn’t hard to estimate the path he took.

 

 

I’m staring at his black hair swaying as he turns the map upside down in order to figure it out. He’s all grown up, that kind of thought, suddenly came to me.

“Hey, Kaid.”
“Yes?”
“As I thought, I keep correcting my words, don’t I? No matter how I think about it, this treatment to you, the fief’s lord, is definitely rude.”

As I told him the thing I had in mind all the time, Kaid looked utterly displeased.

“Please spare me. If I receive a humbled down gesture from you, my lady, I want to die.”
“I-it probably won’t become that far. ……Hold on, don’t tell me, you weren’t even planning to return to the mansion?”
“Eh?”
“……Eh?”

Silence falls.
From the slightly open window, I can see the cloudless sky, feel the wind that is just as refreshing, but inside the carriage, we are wrapped in speechless atmosphere.
Would this be the reason why Isidore didn’t want to get into the carriage with us? I can sympathize with him, somehow.

 

 

Inside the carriage, a sudden meeting had begun. A meeting of two, but somehow, there’s not a glimpse of a festive mood in it.
The agenda is about us, from now on.
We both find our knees very interesting. Kaid stretches his body with a snap, but before, I tried to do so with great difficulties. But still, we stretched as much as we could.

“Kaid,”
“Yes, my lady.”
“…………Uhm, you know, my name is Shirley Hince.”
“I have known about it.”

I wonder how I should say it, so I just speak while squeezing my brain. At any rate, there’s the way to engage in a discussion without touching, but I think that will result in mutual discomfort. I don’t want to fight him either……. We never fought before. Never in brawls, of course, but not even a verbal argument. Not only with Kaid, with anyone.
I never had anyone who was close to my age, being raised among adults. Hence the lack of fight I ever had. It was difficult to meet someone else in the first place, let alone having someone who treated me as an equal, not that anyone was ever allowed to.
As that thought passed my mind, it sounds as if I want to have an argument, but to say that I want it to happen right now is a no.
Holding the forefinger and the middle finger, I lick my lips that’s already dry without being noticed.

“Hey, Kaid. My current self doesn’t have the blood of a royalty. I’m not even the daughter of an aristocrat.”
“Even so, it doesn’t change the fact that you are still my lady.”
“You are the fief’s lord, and I am a maid. With my current place, I have to call you Master. Actually, that’s the reason why I shouldn’t speak to you this way. Even knew that.”

In that sense, I knew that I couldn’t do it with my position. Originally, I must wait until Kaid starts the talk, as my master, but Kaid seems to be intent on waiting for my turn instead. Thus our talk never really started.
Even now, I’m making a face that sincerely shows my thoughts, without treating it as a joke or sarcasm.

“A more exalted figure than you are, who else could it be but the royal family who lives in the royal palace?”
“Kaid.”

Kaid turns his head towards me, which now looks as troubled as I am. No, it looks like he’s in more agony, more despair than me. But even so, those golden eyes were so dazzling that they looked like they were almost burnt out, even now, even when they looked like they would melt into tears.

 

“……I beg you to forgive me, my lady. For me, my lady is my lady. I didn’t believe that my lady could have truly come to love the likes of me. You were, truly, an unattainable flower. Your figure, your voice, your words, your feelings, everything that you gave to the world, every single thing was beautiful, and I thought, all the time, if only I could serve you. How joyous it would be, were you to live at the end…… From the beginning, I am a man who lives to serve under someone. I even wished, of having you as my only master, living only for your sake, protecting the Laius where you would reign over, how good could it be. I wished to that extent.”

My eyes are wide open at his confession.
I had no clue that he felt that way. People like him truly wished for a stupid thing. I don’t have the slightest ability to govern this land. I didn’t see a thing, didn’t hear a thing, a woman who had willingly submerged herself in the only happiness that was given to her.
No, it was a fact that he already understood. That’s why, he didn’t choose that road. Maybe it’s more accurate to say it must have been a road that he couldn’t choose.
If he chose that road for Laius at that time, it would be the same as choosing Laius’ collapse. More than collapse, a crueler rebellion, or even war, could have happened.
If he left a single person from the lord’s family, the main cause, alive, and even placing her in the position of the lord, what could have happened? There was no way that someone as clever as him couldn’t figure it out. Even someone as foolish as me could notice.
The principal offender was our aristocrat family, to the bitter end. But even so, only giving a severe punishment and placing me in that kind of position couldn’t have been something good. Laius would be enveloped in disputes, in war. If things were handled awkwardly, even he could have been punished.
That’s why, from the depth of my heart, I’m glad that his reasoning won.
I’m a completely cruel woman, to feel this relieved at his unfulfilled wish, but this is the only thing I feel relieved about.
Looking at my appearance, with his own face in a bitter smile–or is it suffering there?–Kaid continued.

“But even so, I fell in love with you. And, you, too, came to like me. How could it happen, to the likes of me, I’m still thinking about that. ……However, I’m truly sorry. I cannot give it up anymore.”

Kaid covers his face with both hands, looking downwards. He’s all grown up now, no longer in his youthful stage, and yet, I could see his irritation, just like a little child.

“……I’m truly sorry, my lady. Perhaps, this part of me, isn’t a pretty or noble thing such as fondness or love. No, a long time ago, it truly was. It’s probably just my wishful thinking, but at least, it was something different than what I feel now…… However, now, it has melded with obsession, with greed, turning into something brutal and self-centered. Therefore, now, I could no longer let go of your hand. I’m sure that I am…… not a single bit different than him. Forgive me, forgive me, my lady. I couldn’t bestow upon you kindness and warmth, I still touch you even as unsightly as I am. I beg you, please, forgive me.”

That voice which begs for forgiveness gradually turns hoarse, then finally diminishes. His crossed fingers make a creaking noise, as if his muscle and bones is going to break out of his skin.
Have we entered a flat road? Compared to before, the shaking has increased. Even so, along with the small shakes from the rattling carriage, I’m looking at the top of his downcast head. Even in this kind of circumstance, I couldn’t help but to absentmindedly notice that his hair still whorls clockwise, same as before, that long time ago. While thinking that I had been looking at this head too, back then, I exhale a deep, narrow, long breath. I figured out that whenever I exhale my breath, the strength will further break my bones, but still it grows stronger.

“…..In that case, I have to think of a way to explain to everyone, so that there won’t be a problem from now on.”

As I said it, his head that stubbornly cast downwards, twitches.

“Thinking about something like that isn’t exactly my forte, but…… that’s right…… I will be my lord’s wife. That’s why, what should I do, if you stay afraid, using honorifics at me? I might touch upon the lord’s dignity…… but, as the lord’s wife, I’m sure I could do it, leave it to me. A long time ago, I studied by reading Mother’s and Grandmother’s ladylike correspondences, as well as Father’s and Grandfather’s gentlemanly correspondences. In the ladylike correspondences, there was a column for “A Skillful Way to Make Rounds in the House”, while in the gentlemanly correspondences, there was a column for “Today’s Submission to Her”, so I knew about a lot of stories.”

It used to feel like the talk from a faraway land, somehow, some talk that would never have anything to do with me. They had no sense of reality, I read them just like I read novels.
I figured that the day would come when that knowledge would be necessary, if it’s my current life. But Kaid somehow only stares speechlessly. Since it’s the face that finally looked up, it’ll be good if he’s laughing happily instead, in my opinion.

“……Excuse me, my lady?”
“What is it~?”
“……………….Am I allowed, to marry you?”
“E.”

It was my turn to turn pale. That was an assault that made me so embarrassed that my blood felt like being drained, I unconsciously cover my mouth with both hands.

“Th, that’s right. I’m, now, no longer a noble’s daughter, I don’t have any good background anymore, it’s hopeless to become a fief’s lord’s wife. No, I, suddenly, acting like this, I’m sorry. That’s right, we’re lovers. It’s fine with me. I will definitely support your wife. I’ll never butt in, or threat the wife, or…… Can we at least reach the town first?”

Thinking about shameless things spontaneously, my head is hanging from being too embarrassed that my chest hurts. I was being haughty. We promised to live together, but his social status and mine this time around are too far apart, so how could I spontaneously think like that?

My downward vision was obstructed by his hand. I lifted my flustered face, Kaid was there, before my lap. There was his face, looking paler than mine, fading to blue, even.

“I, I’m sorry. A friend. A friend, isn’t it? Yes, a friend……….. is probably hopeless, though…… A contact…… An acquaintance……”
“Please stop getting even further away. Why are you only using your aristocratic sensibility for that part? It is fine to register you as someone’s adopted daughter if you’re worried about social status, moreover, I think it won’t be a problem at all. If my lady could find it to forgive me…… the master of that mansion is you, my lady.”

No sooner than saying all those things, Kaid grasped my hand with both hands and bumped our foreheads. It wasn’t just the fingertips like he did in the cavern, he’s holding my whole hands this time.

“……Am I allowed for that, my lady? I’m this kind of man, I didn’t prepare a ring, or anything.”

Peeking on his golden eyes, my shoulders lose their stiffness. I’m so glad that it’s not a misunderstanding on my part. Being together with him in this life within our hearts is all right, but if possible, I want to live a life where I can be forgiven for being close enough to touch him with my position.
With my hands in his grasp, his lips drop to my forehead.

“Then give me your oath. Give me an oath that from now on…… this time around, we’ll be happy, and we’ll be happy together.”

His fluttering open eyes is such an adorable sight. At first, that’s the only thing in my mind, then that love is overflowing.
It’s good that Kaid doesn’t move this time, since for the second time, my kiss drops above his eyelid.

“As the fief’s lord, it’s no good to address me like this, but…… if that’s Kaid’s wish, it’s okay. I’m going to work hard to fulfill Kaid’s wishes. Even if I can’t give it directly to you, it’s okay, it’s okay, Kaid. Tell me all your selfish desires. I want to listen to your selfishness. If you’re too cruel, I’m going to scold you, be mad at you, pout at you. That’s why, calm down and tell me. I want to know your selfishness. I want to know your wishes. Hey, Kaid. I wonder if you’d tell me the wish you desire so much to kill for. Little by little, I don’t mind no matter how small it is.”

This time, I kiss the hands that grasp mine.
My vow.

“I’m in love with you, Kaid. Obsession or greed, if it’s yours, I’m happy. Love is this kind of thing, isn’t it? I’m sure I’m the same, too. Because we’re lovers, you see. It’s not a strange thing at all.”

Don’t bow your head. This is the road that you paved, so don’t bow in front of me. Don’t drown yourself in reasons. Don’t throw away the road where you live as Kaid.

“Speak selfishly. I’ll do the same. This time around, I won’t lie. It’s okay to have a small secret, but let’s talk a lot. Teach me a lot of things. The things about you that I don’t know about. Then, I wish you’ll listen to the things about me that you don’t know either. We both have troublesome characters, so if we don’t talk often, I’m sure there are things that we can’t convey. Hey, Kaid? I’m not seeking to mend things with you. We’ve already separated once. That’s why, this time around, I want to start with you. Let’s think. The way to do things as ourselves. Let’s shape it on our own.”

I did the same thing. I could find excuses everywhere, but saddling myself with those things will only make me depressed.

“I want to be your happiness.”

No matter how deep I’m sinking or drowning, the hell has no bottom. Struggling in agony, dragging other people to the same place. When I look at the people I’ve hurt, it is an infinite quicksand.

“I want to be happy.”

But, please.
If you hold me, do it for me.

“I want to be happy, with you.”

More than you can reason for, hold me tight.
Because I’ll do the same for you. Because this time, I’ll live it through.

 

 

Kaid gazed downwards, and I could hear a long, long sigh from his smiling face. While holding my hands, he rubs his cheeks to my stomach. He’s not heavy, but the stubble on his face is ticklish. My hands are full, so I close my eyes while rubbing my cheeks on his black hair. Did he laugh? I could tell that his body slightly shook.

“……You’re too bold, my lady. I’m 30 now, but I feel pitiable.”
“I’ve lived for fifteen years, it feels like I could finally breathe now.. ……Uhm, too enthusiastic……….. I did as I please, is what it is, I suppose. Uhm, forgive me for acting as I please?”
“……My lady, is there anything you want selfishly ask?”

His muffled murmur doesn’t press me, so I think a little.

“You’re right…… I, want you to release my hand.”

With the hands that he released in an instant, I hold Kaid’s head.

“Then…… that, uhm………… let’s return to the original topic.”
“Yes?”

I pushed his head down with all my strength despite him wanting to lift it up, he gradually settled into my arms obediently. That way, I hide my happy, blushing face in his hair.

“……It’s true that I thought you were strange as the lord. I didn’t lie either when I said that if it was your wish, I wouldn’t change my attitude and speech. But…… I-if we’re lovers, your…… That, uhm………….. I want to, uhm, see, your relaxed, less formal self…… and, that, uhm…… if you can call me, by my name, Shirley, I’d be truly happy, so……”

It’s not like I want him to rock me back and forth in his lap like Father did, though that’d be cute too; I just think that it’ll be good if he put his defense down with me.
But, this is truly just my selfishness. I understand that I’ve become so embarrassed that my ears and neck are too feverish. His head, which has been obediently staying still, has started moving again, so I panic and press it down again.

“My lady.”
“No way.”
“I want to see your face.”
“You can’t.”
“My lady.”
“It’s my privacy.”
“Shirley, I want to see.”

My breath stops. That, just now, is just, too much.

“You said you’d let me see your expressions.”
“……No.”
“Show me.”
“…….You’re too much.”

This is too much.
My mouth curls in displeasure, I mess around with his defenseless hair. And yet, the face that he slowly turns to look up is looking terribly mischievous. I wonder where the man with child-like tear-stained face has gone to.
Matching him, I’m sure I’m blushing so hard that it’s improper. My ears, my cheeks, my nape, they must have been breaking out in fever even though they’re not touched. Staring hard in point blank at this face, Kaid hums in a sing-sang voice.

“So cute. Shirley, you’re so cute.”
“…….You’re bullying me.”
“Haven’t you figured it out already?”

His canine tooth peek out from his parting lips.
I’m sure that was a smile, but his feral look told me I was the prey.
“I’m actually really evil.”

 

From our overlapping lips, I could taste the sweet candy and the antidote.

The town where the mansions resided was filled with unprecedented loud shouts of joy. The whole town was decorated three times as much as preparation for the festival, all of them was devoted to the joyous return of Kaid. This was surely as merry as being in the festival itself.
Their greatest joy was represented by such a big volume that I couldn’t even hear what I was saying.
Kaid pushed out the window, facing the people outside, waving his hand with a smile, and I looked at him. Until the very end, Isidore refused to accompany us in the carriage.
His “I was kicked by a horse” reason was something that no one told me. When we took a break and climbed down the carriage before, I realized that I was seen by everyone in the flesh like a hot potato. It made me blush hard.

Kaid threw a glimpse at me, then his lowered hand made a signal. I leaned my head and sat beside him. When I did, he hugged my shoulder in the unseen angle from the outside. I wondered if he noticed and wryly smiled.

 

 

The carriage stopped. The reason was neither for break, falling into mud, nor a broken wheel.
We’ve finally arrived at the mansion.

My tightly grasped forefinger and middle finger are as freezing as the midwinter, but they are damp with sweat.
I said the cruelest things. I vomited the words that would cruelly hurt the kind people by choice.
That was caused by Wilfred, but our relationship was the root of it.
I don’t know what kind of eyes await for me beyond this door. I knew about Kaid’s explanation for them while dashing with his fastest horse, that I was taken as a hostage. I’m sure they were concerned about my condition. They are that kind of people. I knew that. They are not people who would blame or rebuke me for shouting those thoughtless remarks while being held hostage. I knew that.
I know that, but my limbs are shaking. There’s a clattering sound from my teeth.
Because, you see, this place was where I was convicted.
There were many cheers, rejoicing, wishing for my death. The excited voice of those who were happy overlapped with the excited voices of those who were set free; they were a little, just a bit, too intense.

As my head hung low, the door was open, blowing wind onto me. If I look up, I’m going to hold onto Kaid’s hand, who has climbed down before me. Without hurrying, I reach out his smiling and waiting figure. I lean one of my arms until my chest won’t be in pain, stepping out of the carriage while slightly bending down my body.
It’s all right. It’s not burning hot. That red color was in the past. There’s no longer redness in the sound, in the smell, nor in anyone’s eyes.
I keep telling them to myself. My heart is more sluggish than the clock tower’s bell, but it beats with all its strength.
This time, my arms won’t be twisted, I won’t be forced to prostate on the ground. There’s a hand that will support me, so I’m not afraid. It’s scary, but I’m not afraid. I’m all right.
I stop chewing my lip, and slowly lift my head up.

As if it had been waited for, the voice were in unison.

 

 

“Master.”
“M’lady.”

“Welcome home.”

 

 

A row of people lining up, bowing at the same angle, made the trembling I’ve been having to disappear. Only bewilderment remained.
I understand if it’s Kaid. This place is Kaid’s territory, Kaid is the lord of this fief, the head of the mansion. The master. The righteous. That’s the way it is.
Welcome home. I get it too. You see, because this is Kaid’s mansion.

But.

“…………My lady?”

Pondering dumbfoundedly, I look up to Kaid.
It’s too much of a surprise. Kaid wryly smile and push my back forward, a little.

The one leading the bowing people whom I’ve become familiar with, Kaid’s aide and direct subordinate, the head butler and the head maid, and then, people who are somehow too scattered in the lines. Just like Caron, these people are always here.

“What’s wrong, you guys? I’ve brought Shirley back as I promised, you know? Carolina, you’re frozen, Jasmine too, aren’t you nailed to the ground? The people behind you are restless and stuck, you know?”

Hearing Kaid’s words, Caron slowly lifts her head up. Just like her, the people around there are looking up. And then, with a crumple.
With a crumple, their faces distort.
Among them, the oldest man is well past his middle age, but everyone is equally on the verge of tears, and I look back at Kaid, who pushes me forward. Kaid, making a mischievous expression, leans his body and whispers to my ear.

“I only told Carolina.”
“……Only?”
“I left it to her to choose whom to tell…… Most likely, all of your former staff already knows? If their looks are any indication.”

M’lady, I look at them again in sudden realization, at the quivering voices.
Caron and the others walk forward, one staggering step at a time, and collapsed right before my feet. In their folded position, none of them moves an inch, so that they don’t break into tears. I’m unable to move too.

“We have been waiting for you.”
“Caron.”

Caron starts sobbing.

“To have you, return, all well, from the depth of my heart, the same as everyone, from our deepest hearts, we have been waiting.”

The voices, in unison.

“M’lady……!”
“Shirleeey!”

Only one person burst differently.
Jasmine jumped out from the neat row. Together with Jasmine, with her messy tears and snots, the others were jumping in. Even Samua started running.
After that, each one of them raced against one another, until the row completely disappeared, no one knows since when.
Whether she stumbled to it, or if that was her plan from the start, looking at Jasmine who jumped and ran forth already made my chest throb in ache before she even arrived.

“Hey, hold it, Jasmine! I told you, Shirley is injured!”
“Jhaarliiiiiy!”

With Samua’s arms restraining her from the back, Jasmine cries in a mess, stretching her hands out. When I grasp that hand, her face wrinkles again around her eyes. Without wiping away her dripping, overflowing tears, Jasmine is sobbing.

“Sorry, I’m so sorry, I’ve hurt you, I’m sorry, it must’ve been scary, it must’ve hurt, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Shirley.”
“Me too…… I’m sorry I said those cruel things to you. I chose the exact words that would’ve inflicted pain for you.”
“The fact that I was close enough to you for you to know the words painful to me, I’m so happyyy……!”

Jasmine raised her voice in tears just like a child; as soon as the hold to her arms was released, she jumped straight like an arrow, then hugged me like I was fragile. Her light, soft, warm body wasn’t as painful as I thought, so I wrapped my arms around her trembling, flustered back.

“Boohoooooooooo, Jharliiiy!”
“There’s no Jharly here! …………Welcome back, Shirley. I’m glad that you’re all right.”
“Th, thank you. ……Uhm, what’s that about calling me m’lady?”

I thought to ask to the only person who wasn’t crying, but when I looked up, his eyes were red too.

“What, you ask, that should have been our line, we knew nothing, none at all. Why, how, since when, I don’t even know, but Shirley is going to marry Master, right? Therefore, since as our Mistress, as the wife, Shirley is still too young, isn’t married yet, to call you Mistress out of no where would make you bewildered, so everyone was mulling over how to call you. It would be good to call you Shirley-sama, but Carolina and the others preferred m’lady, and we thought it sounded nice too…… Should we change it?”
“N, no, that’s, unnecessary, really. All of you, are good, just as you are. That’s what I want.”
“I see. I’ll address you properly in front of the guests, but otherwise, I agree with you.”

As Samua laughs in relief, I feel relieved too.

Now, the biggest reason to strain my surroundings in vain respect is gone, I’m no longer a person to be humbled upon. That was one of the reasons, but the treasures I got from this mansion were too many; I felt lonely. That’s why, I want to stay this way.
Right now, I’m going to look for the shape of things as they ought to be, right here, from now on.

“Samua, you know, Tim,”
“………..yeah, he–”
“He loved you a lot.”
“E?”

The eyes he was hiding in pain widens to circle shapes.

“He really loved you, so he targeted you. He really loved you, so he didn’t let you drink the poison, choosing to drink it himself instead.”

For him, there must be a lot of chances. He could have put it in the food, even mixing it in the ingredients. There really wasn’t any meaning to drink it himself, nor was there any meaning to drinking it alone.
He’s warped. Defiant. It would’ve been better if he was only those, but he couldn’t even be like that, so he was drowning. His past pushed him down, twisted him around from the depth of hell, kept him in the middle of falling forth.
Kaid said that he was just like him, but I was the same. He, was my other self.

“When I see him again, I must sink my fist to that guy. Because I’m his senior, you see.”

Swallowing whatever he wanted to say before, Samua grinned wide. That smiling face was truly dazzling.

Stupid Tim. Stupid Wilfred.
You and I are both foolish.
Even though we had a future here. Even though Laius is, now, facing a different future. Even though the days when only ruin awaited was long gone already, replaced by a future that spins the tale of budding smiles.
Why are we nothing but a prisoner of our past?
Even though the life that wasn’t born at that time, the smiles in their faces that wouldn’t appear if not for that day, are this precious already.

“My lady.”

Kaid holds my shoulders.
I can’t stop the tears. My chest is in pain from sobbing this heavily, but more than that, it’s painful even deeper in. It’s painful, and warm, and agonizing.
I have nothing but regrets. I’ve only been making mistakes, hurting those around me, running away, but why is it so, so warm in this place? The building is different, the garden is gone. Even my family, none of them is around except me, but why does it feel that, even with all of those, nothing has changed?

“M’lady.”
“Shirley.”

People who know my past self, people who only know my current self, they call me all the same. While crying, while laughing, they have been waiting for me.
Clasping both of my hands, I bow deeply.

“I’m home at last.”

Let’s live in this place. Let’s live with them. Let’s live as myself.
No matter what happens, let’s return back here.

Because, you see, this was once my final abode.
This is my living birthplace, even now.


RAWS by Morino Ion

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Translator’s Notes: 

12,200+ characters! I’m flabbergasted. Why am I slaving to this. Oh right maybe it’s because I was grossly sobbing during translation.

I can’t help but to use the word “love” instead of “like” when Shirley talks about Tim’s feelings to Samua lmfao. It’s a fair game, okay? In the last chapter I translated it that way between her and Kaid, hmph. The ship sails, okay? It sails! *coughs*

And so after this chapter, it’s the finale.

The Wolf Lord’s Lady – 18

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18. You, me, and the world’s rule

“Is anyone here—-!?”

Maybe it’s so that they won’t lose out to the muddy waters, or maybe it’s the volume of his feelings. Their feelings.
As the barks and the reverberating loud voices come to my ears, I push Kaid away, not expecting to hear signs of people so sudden. Kaid looks at me who openly runs away, with a face that won’t say anything.
Have I hurt him? Have I shown him that I want to treat everything until now as nothing, that I hated him after all?
I don’t think like that at all. It’s just, a little, a bit, startling, there’s no way I could hate him.

Then, I properly receive the punishment for recklessly hurting Kaid, who has only been thinking about my interest: My chest hurts from moving so sudden. My heart hurts, but my chest also hurts. It hurts so much that I can’t breathe in or out.

Kaid panics and supports me, who’s crouching and groaning. I’ve hurt him, but he’s so kind. Groaning, I clutch to Kaid’s clothes.

“I r-really love you.”
“………..What are you saying in this situation?”
“Because, I pushed you away just now……”
“…………I’m going to act conceited, I didn’t feel hated so much that I was despaired from that. If anything, what you said just now is more shocking.”
“Ah?”

Kaid, supporting me with one hand and covers his face with another hand, groans.

“Hello! Is there anyone here—!?”

The voice that roars for the second time echoes with a tinge of sobs. Kaid makes a deep, deep sigh, then lifts his face up in a flash.

“There are two here! But, Tim was washed away! Keep looking with haste!”
“My lord!? My lord! …….Aah, you’re alive!!”

The voice of a youth goes through a whole range of emotions. Shock, doubt, delight, delight, delight. Then, his voice is raised to another direction from us, faint as if being damped by the muddy stream in front of me.

“The lord is alive and well—!”

The cheer I’m hearing now sounds wet with tears, so much that the youth’s voice can’t begin to compare.
Their triumphant voice rises up, with gross sobbing that doesn’t lose to the muddy waters.
The cheers also don’t lose out to the down pouring sobs from the sky, until Kaid raises his voice.

“I get it, so keep looking for Tim! It’s a race until the border of Darich’s territory, go!”

That’s right. Wilfred can only be searched within Laius’ territory. Beyond them, it’s no longer under Laius’ authority. It becomes the issue of Darich, of Joblin. How vexing.
Kaid’s authority exceeds another fief’s lord’s in Laius. In Darich, Joblin has the higher authority. It has to be that way. If there’s a lord of that fief, flaunting his authority as the lord of another fief is heavily inexcusable. It’s so extreme that the territory might suffer a military occupation, were it to happen.
Kaid can only search within Laius’ domains. After that, once it’s out of his jurisdiction, he can’t proceed to lay his hands or have his way with it.

Hopefully, Wilfred can be found. At least, I hope he’s alright.
I have no idea whether surviving this will become his salvation or not, but I think so. Even if it’s more cruel for him that way…… I still think so.

 

 

“Hah-! Should we dump it together, then?!”
“Yeaaah!”
“I’ll do it too!”

Why are they saying “then”, I wonder with my head slightly tilted, and a stone, fastened into a rope, was thrown before me. Kaid, who receives the rope that’s securely attached to something on the other end, strongly tugged the rope several times to test it.

“What is that rope for?”
“This is a hollow area when the water volume is low. When the water level is high, no once can enter this area from above. That’s why, we fasten our bodies with this and get pulled up from above.”
U……”
“I will lessen my lady’s burden as much as possible. …….Before that, I apologize as of late, but, would you please come here?”

Holding my chest as if it will creak just from breathing, I imagine myself being fastened to the rope while being pulled out. Just imagining it feels painful, truly. It seems that the pain shows up on my face, as Kaid’s face turns apologetic.
I need to be pulled up anyway, so it’s not my place to complain, and he has told me that he’ll make it as less painful as possible. The moment I start to calm down, I tilt my head at the wrinkled garment that was given to me.
It’s wet, naturally, but still dried than the clothes we both wear. It can be seen from the wrinkles, actually. Perhaps I feel too numb, but that coat isn’t that cold. We’re already drenched, so it won’t be anything different, I think. Or, will I be wrapped in thick clothes until the rope doesn’t dig painfully to me? Then I finally understand.
Concluding by myself, I receive the coat that can’t be said to be light at all. The water has been squeezed out as much as possible, but it’s still really heavy. My father’s coat was also heavy, and my grandfather’s coat was probably the same. A nobleman’s coat is heavy. I don’t know about Wilfred’s coat.
Privately, I think I like the coat of the majority of the commoners who live in the street, donning light coats. However, the texture of this one is definitely better. I guess I really am a selfish person.
Kaid looks at me, who spreads the coat that I received, with a complicated look in his eyes.

“Kaid?”
“Ha…… No, nothing…… Does your neck hurt?”
“Neck?”

That’s right, Wilfred did something to it, I believe. My eyes look down upon the tattered clothes that he violated until it exposed my neck and chest. It hung low on my chest, while the neck part is already hopeless, of course.
When I look at Kaid, demanding for explanation, he made a stubborn look that won’t say anything, nothing at all. It’s not the face that “won’t say anything” because he doesn’t know how to explain it. It’s an expression that holds a lot more anger and sorrow than chaotic thoughts. However, it seems to be directed beyond me, because I will feel even more chaotic for sure. It’s that kind of his “won’t say anything” face.

“The teeth mark,”
“……The teeth mark. Aah, the teeth mark…… That’s right!”

I instantly tilt my neck, recalling the source. Now that I recall it, I was bitten by Wilfred. It’s not strange that he left a mark; it was really painful. Afterwards, things happened one after another, so I completely forgot about it.
I’m pressing closer to Kaid with vigor. Kaid looks taken aback, a little. In introspect, it feels indeed improper, so I kill the momentum and go back to my previous spot, but as I thought, I have been a little more enthusiastic.
Because it was my first, you know? After I could properly feel my emotions, I do feel excited for my first time.

“Listen to me, Kaid!”
“Yes?”
“You know, I did it for the first time, I brawled in a scuffle for the first time!”
“…………yes?”
“Now, and back then, I never did it, ever, but I properly got into a brawl, you see. Compared to my first time in a fight, Wil was stronger, but I properly scratched him and let my kicks fly.”

Before, without any siblings, nor peers close to my age.
This time around, as an orphan, there were peers, but with whom I didn’t build a connection.

I’ve messed around before, of course, but I never got into a fight. My first fight, a big fight where I scuffled and grappled. I think my first experience was a huge success. Isn’t it something that I could boast about?

“Wil was soon beaten in the face. That’s why, I think I properly returned the things he did to me. If I work hard, even I can fight. I admired a warrior in the book I read a long time ago, so much that I played pretend with a broom, you know? I was berated for acting improperly, it was quickly confiscated from me, but I really admired them back then.”

Both my hands balled into fists, I laugh as if saying, how’s that.
I thought Kaid would be surprised for me, but he doesn’t move an inch, covering his face with one hand. By what I could see from the gaps, his eyebrows turned into a deep wrathful frown.

“That bastard……”

With the word that seems to spit out his annoyance, he unwraps my fists one by one. He grasps both of my hands once again, his shoulders falling down to the sides.

“……So I was hopeless, after all.”
“No, my lady, you are admirable. It’s just, that man is,”
“Wil is?”
“Under any kinds of circumstances, don’t forget that he harassed you if you gave him the opportunity to. The fact that you showed the willpower to rebel against him is really worth admiring, so I was thinking what I could give to you as a reward. If I meet him again, I’ll hit him until there’s no trace of his original form. I’ll hit him a hundredfold of how he hit you, my lady.”
“…………Six hundred times, is a little too-”
“…………So he hit you six times? I understand. I’ll kick him instead.”
“That’s also a bit…… I wonder what should I do.”

I tried to imagine Wilfred being kicked six hundred times, but it was difficult. I could only imagine both sides being out of breath.

“I’ll return the hitting part to him by myself, so, if it’s alright, I’ll be happy if you teach me how to throw a punch.”
“I’ll prepare Wilfred until there’s no trace of his original form first.”
“…………I think there’s something wrong with that.”

Kaid sinks into silence taciturnly, starting to tie the rope to me silently instead. After tying the bottom and the legs, he’s leaving the rest of me and says “Pardon me” as the only warning before holding me in his arms. Because my position is changed, my chest is back in pain and my breath stops, but I’m enduring it.

“My lady, how painful is your chest? If I lift both of your arms, will it be all right?”
“Wait, a bit……. It hurts, but I’m fine. What should I do?”
“Please wrap your arms around my neck, and fix your body in place. I’m sure it will lessen your pain.”
“I understand………… P-pardon me.”
“……My lady. I beg you, so please forgive me at least for now, if I’m loosening up or putting my strength in strange places.”
“Which one is it?”
“Either one. We’re going. The shock will arrive soon, so please don’t ever let go.”

While holding me up in his arms, he enters the water while choosing the spot along the wall. In comparison, the water stream feels calmer.
Kaid tugs on the rope and inhales several times. I know it because my chest is pressed against him. It’s very embarrassing, somehow.

“Pull!”
“Yes! He—y, pull over—!”

I only remember up to that point. To be accurate, I can only keep my consciousness up to that point.

The rope, as a tool being constructed for the sake of speed to pull us out, was pulled by horse and soldiers. After we climb out, there’s only one word that I remember in dazzling clarity.
That it’s definitely not just “a little shocking”.

 

 

 

 

After we got pulled up, a lot of people were rushing over excitedly. The great joy conveyed by their eyes, voices, arms, was also directed towards me.
I’m glad, I’m really glad to be alive, I’m really glad to be okay.
Let alone being unable to do anything, I’ve even spread the calamity to their precious lord, telling those things to those kind people. Even among them, there are people who wouldn’t accept those words. We, were there.
I shake off the glimpse of thought.
Wrong. This isn’t that kind of place to think like that. Let’s focus on showing them honestly about how happy I am. I want to be able to think that it’s okay to be happy. Let’s receive honestly those feelings in me. Because I’ve decided to stop thinking that I must go and take the gloomy path.

“Kaid! My lad…………”
“My lad?”

Isidore who parts the crowded people to arrive here quickly presses his mouth close. One of the soldiers repeats him in confusion. Isidore, who becomes the center of attention, flaps his mouth open and close more than once, then finally decides to open his mouth as if he wants to say something.

“M-my lamb……”
“Your lamb!?”

He must be unable to withstand it, to raise his voice to the Gimmi army.

“……Do I look like it?”
“Look, like it?”
“Ah no, Isidore-sama even slipped, so I must look like one.”
“Ah, maybe, you do. I didn’t know he ever has any lamb, though.”
“I didn’t either. Oh, right.”

I’m comparing myself and the imaginary lamb. Well, in the past, I was also someone who knew nothing but books, so I couldn’t blame his excuse.
Isidore clears his throat once, rising his eyebrow, as I remove my hand from Kaid’s shoulder, whose arms had been wrapped around me.

“You’re always reckless.”
“If I stick to the impossible, it probably will turn out right.”
“As if, you idiot! ……You too, my lady, at least you’re safe, above all.”

When I hear those words that he whispered, I respond with a smile.
However, soon I must retract it. Splitting, for the sake of passing through Isidore, the crowd has been dispersed without being noticed, parted once more. I realized who could have come to part the crowd wider than before, even if I didn’t want to.
I whisper to Kaid’s ear.

“Let me down.”
“It’s impossible without cutting the rope, and I’ll refuse anyway.”

Between those mutual whispers, I secure my nail to the knot. However, the weight of two people has strained the rope and made the knot way too secure. If I untie this, the knot will be worn out, probably. I can only give up on the idea of removing myself.

While doing so, exactly as expected, the other party shows up, without a happy face at all.
It’s like waving a completely thick lump of meat all over, without putting it down.

“Oh no, no…… Do not do the impossible. But, all I could say is as one would expect from the strength of your fortune, that you can neatly come back to life. Or should I say, as one would expect from Laius’ lord, huh?”
“To receive such words from Darich’s lord, what an honor. However, are you all right? Our acquaintance is to be married, if I’m not mistaken. I wish to extend my congratulations as well.”
“Ho, ho, ho…… To receive Laius’ lord’s congratulatory address, it is the greatest delight. Now, then, for the sake of passing it to them, I need to excuse myself from here. As long as Laius’ Wolf is going strong, even Darich will not be touched. Everyone, you must rejoice. Isidore-sama, I wish for your well being as well.”
“You as well, Joblin-sama.”

The two lords and one lord’s representative lightly bow their respects to their surrounding soldiers, who receive the deeper bows from the servants and retainers.
Laius’ soldiers, Gimmi’s soldiers, no one touch a single hair of Darich’ hands.
This is Laius’ territory, but it still doesn’t matter. If there’s no clear evidence against another lord, he can’t be put into trial. If one wants to punish the lord of another fief, one must ask for an audience with the king, taking all of the sound proofs available. Then, one must abide by the rules. At most, a lord is the ruler of a fief. The ruler of a kingdom is the king. Without the king’s approval, another lord will not be able to be put on trial. If he does, it will nurture the rebellious spirit towards the king. Anyone who bypasses the process will be deemed as breaking the king’s authority.

Within that short moment, it was unthinkable to gather the proofs and present it to the king.
That’s why, there’s no option but to let Joblin go back home from this place. There’s no reason to stop a homesick lord. Even though everyone in this place knew what that man actually did.
The eye that is smashed by the meat is looking at me. Is he thinking of how to make use of me? Is he planning to use me for his own gains?
While being held by Kaid, my feet aren’t even on the ground, I understand that I don’t even look appropriate, but I pull my chin and cast my eyes downwards.

“It’s regretful that I cannot attend the wedding.”

There’s no one here who’d criticize the rudeness of a single maid, speaking to the lord of another fief without any prior permission. Not even Joblin himself.

“Ho, ho……. What, it’s just about styling your black hair, though.”

Joblin, who declares in nonchalant tone, can’t act nonchalant when the meat is dangling before him no matter how it looks like, squinting his eyes as he looks at Kaid.

“Your choice, the next generation of ‘Treasured Flower of Laius’ will be scrutinized by the whole kingdom. Plucking a woman whose origin is unknown to anyone, it is in your best interest to protect it carefully.”
“I am greatly obliged to heed your warning. I’ll let the soldiers escort you until the fief’s border. I wish you’ll extort caution, were an unforeseen accident happens.”

Only the muddy stream is visible, swirling into a vortex in menace, raging right to our ears.
In that kind of circumstance, only the hidden meaning of the words will swirl into a vortex of a human, stowing away the rage inside the body.
This, is a farce.
Anyone knows this, a farce that anyone wants to end, but no one is willing to step down before the other, from the stage.
This kind of stage will end only when someone destroys something. And then, the culprit who destroys this stage, will be hailed throughout the history as the victor.

That thing, from a long time ago, is something that exists from the first time human came into being.

 

 

Because that is the rule of the world.


RAWS by Morino Ion

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Translator’s Notes: Please read at isecai.wordpress.com! See you there~

Translation-wise, there are three parts that I’m winging: Shirley’s thoughts after being pulled up, the meat-thing, and the slip of tongue of Isidore.

The original joke is Isidore calling Shirley Ojo, from Ojousama, then fix it to Okojo (ermine). So Shirley originally asked if she looked like an ermine. Upon Elephantno5’s suggestion, changed it into lamb instead.

As for the other two, I’ll return sometime and edit them once I’m enlightened. If anyone wants to help, it’s really appreciated!

The title, “sekai no yakusoku”, upon first glance would mean “the world’s promise”. Though I love how romantic the obscure meaning sounds, in the context of the passage (the very last sentence), I think “rule” is a better fit.

The Wolf Lord’s Lady 17

Hey, everyone! This is a title that I picked up so suddenly because the previous chapter ended in such a cliffhanger. It’s one of the highest rated title in syosetu for tragedy (cruelty-depiction) and female MC filters. Hope you enjoy it!

17. The afterlife, of you and me

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The Wolf Lord’s Lady – 17

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17. The afterlife, of you and me

“—”
“—”

I hear the voice of the wind calling me, turning me around abruptly.

 

 

In the middle of the flower garden where flowers in myriad of colors bloom profusely, I saw a big, white sunshade. Surrounding the round table underneath it, everyone was there.
I lift the fabric of my skirt that seems so long that it will entangle with my legs. I wonder why. I wear this kind of dress all the time, but somehow I find it a little annoying now. Tilting my neck, I arrive at the place where my family is.

“– –, you must be hungry, aren’t you?”
“– –, look, it’s your favorite pastry from the capital city.”
“– –, oh, you, come and sit here.”
“– –, it’s cold over there, right? Sit under this sunshade. It’s warm over here.”

Grandfather, Grandmother, Mother, and Father are all smiling.
There are five chairs around the round, white table. One of them is pulled out, slanting diagonally.
This is my chair.
On the table, there are beautiful sweets lining up, made from the diligent effort of the capital’s chef. The pastries aren’t even the slightest less pretty than the flowers in the garden. Everyone is eating until their cheeks are full.
As I see them from the side, the sweets which are crumbling down again and again to the flower garden, look delicious.

On good weather days, almost everyday, I had tea with everyone just like this.
But today feels slightly different than usual.

Grandfather, shaking a small, transparent bottle of alcohol, looking through the glass against the light.
Grandmother, while humming a song, making dark blue embroidery using many kinds of purple threads.
Father, who usually puts his cigar out as soon as he started smoking it, now chewing the cigar in his mouth without lighting it up.
Mother, who, doesn’t wear her usual shiny hair accessories, looking at the mirror with such a happy face, styling her hair by hand repeatedly.

Those are undoubtedly the usual scene, but my chest feels so suffocated that it hurts. Painful, so painful, the water starts overflowing.

“– –, what’s wrong?”
“– –, where does it hurt?”
“– –, you have it bad, hurry and sit down.”
“– –, where does it hurt? Come, let your mother take a look at it.”

I turn around to look at everyone whose expression quickly changed into sadness.

…kh!

When I heard a voice different to that someone, my lips moved.
If I have to give a name to this thing inside my chest, it would be feeling so full of devastation that you can’t breathe. Now matter how many times I inhale, inhale to fill that emptiness right there, it’s already fully packed that the air is forced back out.

This is the usual scene.
The usual, the mundane.

A gentle illusion.

 

 

The words I want to let out are hindered by the water overflowing from my eyes.

Grandfather. Grandmother. Father. Mother.
I want to ask all of you about a lot of things.

For my family who is looking at me with worried expression, I form the words soundlessly.

Why did all of you raise and teach the just to me?
Oppressing people, trampling their dignity, neglecting their lives, taking only for your selfishness. Why did all of you, who did all of those things, tell me that those were wrong? Why did you teach me that those things that you did were neither natural nor forgivable, that they were certainly evil and not just?

I was the only daughter, thus if I married Wil at that time, I would enter his household, never getting out of there. And then, until the day I die, until Laius perishes, I would live in that miniature garden. I would only take what I see, I would only ask for those you show to me. That way, I certainly would have lived without even knowing that my family was evil.
That’s why, I became warped without realizing it.

Grandfather. Grandmother. Father. Mother.

The reason why you never let me out, was it because you didn’t want me to know that you were evil? Did you regret teaching me that the evils were evil?

Treat people kindly and gently. Do not ever use offensive words. Do not ever hate people. Do not ever beat someone. Do not do the things I wouldn’t like to receive, to someone else. Even if I have no interest myself in something, there are others who will think of it as something precious, so I must never look down on them with contempt. Do not ever take away someone else’s treasured possession. Do not ever do shady things. Let’s believe in someone who doesn’t have a shrewd mind. Do not ever doubt someone or suspect about their ill will, and let’s always put on a smile. Let’s experience things firsthand, instead of just listening to someone else’s experiences. Let’s think positively. Let’s have fun with everyone. Let’s believe in people’s kindness.
You taught me all of those. Everyone has their set of values, so I must not deny them. Let’s treat people kindly. Let’s be kind. Let’s be a good and kind child. So that people will like me, I have to be a good child.

Yes, you always said those things.

“….kh!

I finally understand now, that warped thing.
Your mouth with which you taught me those things, that palm you used to rub my head, those feet you ran and rushed over with when I fell down. What you actually did with them.
And still, why didn’t you think that you were just? Why didn’t you ever say that oppressing people was allowed for those in our positions?
If only you did, if only I was raised that way, I would just be a soul who knew nothing but grudge. I wouldn’t believe in kindness; I would resent, curse, envy those smiles, the warmth of those people; those things wouldn’t be precious to me.

What exactly was I to all of you?
Were you unable to change? Even by looking at me, were you unable to?

My vision was blurry, I couldn’t see my family. The water flooding from my chest, keeps spilling over from my eyes.

Can I believe that, the moment you preached those virtues to me, it wasn’t like you feel nothing? Can I think that, all of you were human beings, even just in those times? The kindness you showed to me, why, to the others, why, at least, the reason you stopped being inhuman, why couldn’t you do that, I couldn’t stop thinking about them.

If there was anything I could have done.
I, at least, surely, could have done something. I could have wondered, then I could have noticed, I could have warned you against it. If only.

 

If I could, would all of you still exist in this world?
Or, was there nothing I could do to change the outcome?

I don’t know. Now, no one knows.
My family, sleeping under the earth, without any concern to my sins.
His hands had set me free, in the land of Laius where flowers bloom once again.

“- -”
“- -?”
“- -”
“- -”

Worrying faces, gentle voices.
My family calls my name.

“…..-dy!

Ever since that time, you were the only ones who called me by that name. I did wonder why no one ever called me by name, but if someone did, they surely would not be forgiven. All of you wouldn’t forgive it. You wouldn’t forgive anyone besides our family to be around me. I only realized now that it wasn’t only because I was going to marry Wilfred that I was raised alone as the only daughter.

“- -”

You were the only ones who called me by my name. All of you were gone now.
That’s why, just take me away like that. Just kill me, like that.

I really loved how pretty, how beautiful the spell and sound of that name.
That’s why, somehow, please don’t let me come to life again, take me away.

The water is flooding until it is deep in my ears.
I don’t know since when, the flower petals have scattered, my chair has disappeared. My family is the only one here, showing your concern. Your gentle hand, gentle voice, gentle words, gentle look. I really loved them.

In the place of the disappeared flower garden, a flower bloomed in solitude. A single flower.

The flower that sways in the water, as if bathed under the sunlight, singing a song to the wind, blooms happily.
Yet, no matter how, I can’t see the color. The bloom opens, I can even count the number of valves in it, but the color is the only thing I can’t grasp.

“…….Thank you.”

Thank you for giving birth to me.
Thank you for raising me.
As a grandfather, as a grandmother, as a father, as a mother, thank you for being by my side.

 

I’m sorry I couldn’t give anything in return. I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t become anything, for anything, something that could have stopped your ruin, I’m really, really sorry.
And.

“…..ady!

I’m sorry.
I’m sorry, I don’t have the capability to hate. I love him. I’m sorry.
Even though I’ve been wishing to come to your side that much in these fifteen years, even though I still cannot see the meaning of this life that much.
I want to live, I want to try to live, I’m, going to live.
I want to know about a lot of things.
I’ve never gone out, from the mansion, at that time, and now, from Kayna, but still, this time, I want to see a lot of things, hear a lot of things, this time I want to think about a lot of things by myself.

My lady!

“………I wish, you could forgive me.”

Somehow, I wish you could forgive this selfish wish of mine, to live with him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“My lady!”

The breath I inhaled is blocked by the water filling my chest, unable to reach the lungs. My attention is drawn into the intense pain passing through my chest, my stomach vomits the water out with the same force. I flip my body to the side in reflex, violently coughing out water or air, I don’t know which one anymore.
The arms which supports almost my entirely crouching, coughing body are making me tilt downwards so that I can breathe easier. After breathing out for a while, the burning pain in my throat and chest finally appears, I realize that I’ve been coughing out towards Kaid, who has been holding me.

“I-it’s filthy.”
“That kind of thing is not important, so please let it all out!”
“I’ve coughed… everything.”

After vomiting everything, as my coughs turn dry with nothing but air, I feel the burning pain in my repeatedly abused throat. Inside my nose, below my ears, inside my head, they’re all painful as if water runs through them.
The dull throb in my head tells me that there’s a burning feeling in my body. Even breathing hurts.
Kaid, who supports by back even when I don’t know if I’m coughing or breathing, finally lessens his strength after ensuring that I won’t pass out.
His arms show relief to me, so I start calming down as well. When I look around, I realize that we’re in a cavern area. It’s a half-circle nook in a rock cliff. I try to go back to the previous place, but I can’t draw strength from my legs due to the water, which entered me. Meanwhile, drift wood and grasses are washed over here, again and again. Beyond that, in the scenery of a gaping wide half-circle nook, no light or muddy water is passing through.
Usually, shouldn’t this kind of place dry? I stare absentmindedly to the surprisingly growing moss at the surface of the ground. More than constantly dry, though, it’s more like the water usually won’t reach that spot.

“Where’s, this?”
“In Kolkia. It’s a place called fortune pocket. There are many things that fall into the stream to get washed up here. There’s an old friend of mine among those who lead the search, they will definitely look up at this place before anywhere else.”
“…..And Wil?”

No matter how hard I look around, I can’t find that small figure of his. Kaid silently shakes his head.

“This place is as small as a pocket, but…”

Kaid hides his eyes slightly.

“Did he refuse to be saved….? ………That idiot.”
“……….This stream, where does it lead to?”
“Darich.”
“Oh…………”
“…………whether I save him or not, with that kind of willpower, he’ll come crawling back from the continent soon enough.”

Throwing a complicated look, Kaid scratched his sore nape.
Going so far as being Joblin’s accomplice, Wilfred was obsessed about Laius. If Joblin was honest, he was being pursued by Joblin’s daughter. In Darich, he could probably live like how he used to, but for him, it wasn’t good if it wasn’t Laius.
We led Laius to its ruin. But even so, this place is still our birthplace. Although we were punished by Laius’ citizen, repelled away from Laius…….. no, it’s because we were repelled from Laius, that we can’t go back to anywhere but here.
If he continues now, if there’s a next time for him, he will still aim for this place. Even if he is born in Laius, living as Laius’ citizen, he will still aim for Laius. Even though he has no other, no other place he can go back to, he will live to aim for Laius, and Laius only.
I feel nothing towards him. No mourning nor sorrow, no anger nor compassion. He fits neither of them. I couldn’t decide which kind of emotion should I feel towards him yet.

 

 

When my eyes are fixed upon a particularly violent splash of waves, I slowly get up. My eyes noticed the golden color.

“My lady?”

My hands are wet. I coughed out all of the water with my strength just now, there’s mud all over me, I feel cold as the temperature goes down.

That’s why, it’s hopeless.
I know that, but my hands can’t stop.
Without any strength, I grit my teeth and desperately lifts my palm, and Kaid doesn’t move to avoid it. My palm arrives at his mud-smeared cheek. The cheek whose temperature feels burning to my freezing palm, I wonder if it feels hot because I’m cold?
His body warmth travels to my palm, my tears are welling up.

“You’re alive……”
“Yes, I’m alive.”
“You’re Kaid.”
“Yes, it’s me. Isidore was so annoying, telling me to relinquish the name of Wolf Lord, that I must be called Elephant Lord since I won against a bear-killer, but for the time being, I’m alive.”
“I, heard the news of your death.”

The town was covered in black, the lamentation overturned the sky.
Even now, I still couldn’t believe it, but a large hand took the hand I used to touch him. With that hand grasping mine, it slowly takes my hand down.

“It’s true that I died once. They confirmed my death, but………… it was Carolina.”
“Caron?”

He clutches his chest, as if recalling something.

It’s way too soon, if you die like this, my kind lady will probably mind it and won’t be angry, so the lady who has just properly gotten her rest will curse and get mad and no longer at peace, so just try to die now. While crying, she said those things and hit my chest so hard that I was resuscitated. Even though my breath had returned, she didn’t realize it and gave me a harder blow for the second time……. Next time, I’ll leave this resuscitation business to the doctor.”
“……………..The good thing about Caron, is……. her full strength.”

If I have to give it a name, “fierce” would be right, but why do I think that that one word still can’t sum up it all?
Those golden eyes opens wide and gazes down at me, who doesn’t know which kind of face can I show him.

“……My lady, please drink an antidote later.”
“……Why?”
“Your heart stopped once.”
“Ah…… No wonder I saw my family again. But…… did I get revived by poison?”

I’ve never heard about that kind of resuscitation, but there are many things in this world that I don’t know yet. Rather, it’s not too much to say that I am composed of the things that I don’t know about.
Kaid awkwardly turns his face.

“…………I judged that waiting for rescue would be too late, so I did the resuscitation. Because there’s a chance that the poison hasn’t completely disappeared from me, please make sure to drink the antidote just in case.”
“…………Thank you.”

When the realization dawned on me, I stirred meaninglessly. I feel my cheeks are heating up. It’ll be bad if I blush, so I covered them with both hands. My cheeks are wet. Of course. I was drowning until just now, of course they’re wet.
No matter how long I wait, it doesn’t seem that my face will be dry, so I remove my hands from my face and grasp tightly my chest, which has been throbbing with pain for a while now. I happen to know multiple causes for that pain, but somehow, I begin to think that they’re not the whole reason.

“Kaid, my chest hurts.”
“Forgive me. I did it with the appropriate amount of power, for a while, but there was no response, so I increased the power. There’s a possibility that it was strong enough to create fissures in your rib bones…… The fissure would be my fault, but you’re also too thin, your bones are too weak from malnutrition. Please eat properly.”
“Yes, thank you.”
“I’m not saying that you have to eat a lot at once, but please increase the amount of food you eat, little by little. And meat. If you’re not good with meat, then fish is good too.”
“Yes.”
“The head chef, he thinks that a young woman will eat if the food is pretty, so he started to carve kittens from carrots, and created goblins instead. If possible, please eat them as they are. His flavor is first class, but his plating sense is nonexistent. He’s a genius, one who regularly challenges himself in food carving which can stun the customers, so please take it into consideration.”
“Yes.”

I can only nod at Kaid who suddenly starts to talk in length. I’m not surprised or bewildered. I really can’t do anything besides nodding.

“Ah, that’s right. I want to raise a request to change the name of Liberation Festival. From now on, I want it to call it the Resurrection Festival. I just think that Wolf Liberation Festival is too much, but that’s just me. My lady, is there any kind of name that you wish for?”

I planned to simply nod and say yes.
But when I think that it’s probably not a suitable response, I already can’t speak.

“…..Please don’t cry.”

I should have coughed out all the water, yet I can’t stop this from overflowing. It doesn’t run out no matter how much I spill it, it feels even more natural in this world than breathing.
I’m confining myself in Kaid’s arms which has been touching me, filling me with unwavering strength. Like that, once the warmth of the embrace that holds me tight so that I won’t be wounded spreads to me, it’s already hopeless.
That’s right, I’m crying. I can’t figure out when it started, but I can no longer stop even if I want to.

“I-I thought you were dead.”
“Please forgive me. I don’t have time to wash a lot of things away, so the first news wasn’t corrected. I made my move only with my closest aides. It’s my bad to decide from my inexperience……….. My lady, my lady, my lady!”

I desperately lift my arm, clinging to him. It’s warm. He’s alive. This warmth, the heartbeat I can tell from touching him, they show me the signs of life, and I can’t stop my tears all the more.

I’m gripping his wet clothes and holding him tight by ignoring the pain in my body, but Kaid softly removes himself.

“……My lady, I…… I know that don’t have the qualification to argue with you, nor do I have the rights to pursue you. But, but, my lady…… Can I treat this as the afterlife? Can I have my life now as my next? Will you forgive me if I start it here? Right now, the promise you bestowed to me, can I hang onto it? Kh…”

His posture now, isn’t even that of a knight nor a retainer.

With his dripping wet, worn out body, he’s down on both knees, both of his large hands are trembling, grasping my weak hand…… my fingertips, barely. He’s grasping just a tiny part of my body, a part as large as barely covering one toe, gluing his forehead, his neck drooping low, looming in silence.

“……I love you. I’m in love with you.”

Right now, which light is carried by that golden color?

“I, love you.”

No matter what, I want to see it.

 

 

Both of his hands, which have been grasping mine, are slowly remo… …staying there, actually. I wonder if I’m too weak to put the strength to my hand, but no matter how hard I try, it doesn’t move an inch, as if our joints are melding together. It’s not as if I’m that weak, but it seems that I can’t put enough strength to shrug them off, no matter what I do. I’m amazed, it seems that my ribs are really broken.
I give up from trying to retrieve my palm, then sigh.

“……I’m troubled.”

Startled, his large figure is shaking. With the other hand that he’s not holding, somehow I’m already touching his freezing cheek that he jumps in startle.

“I already planned to seduce you.”

Then the time passes for a full five seconds.
The body that completely stopped moving finally stirs to move again. So that I can reach the completely still figure for a long time, I’m smiling at the head that slowly lifts up.
Disturbed or disturbing, Kaid is finally opening up, I can see the base of his neck and his collarbone. I look at the blue flower swaying on his chest, which naturally makes me smile so wide that I even surprise myself.

“I could see your face at last. Fufu…… You’ve become even more like Helt now, Kaid.”
“My lady……?”

His expression has become more masculine, the childish roundness is all gone, and his countenance is more haggard now. And yet, it looks like Helt is here. That foolishly mouth gaping look on his face looks impossibly adorable, and to think like that, I’m certainly already hopeless.

Without warning him about his loose spontaneous expression, I touch the swaying flower on his chest.

“My words to Jasmine were really cruel, but…… she delivered it to you.”
“…… Had you said you were throwing it away, she wouldn’t be able to pick it up. Yet, you said that you were going to leave it. That you were leaving it here. That’s why, she said, she picked it up and delivered it to me…… The flower’s meaning makes me unwilling to return it to you, but this is the connection between you and Jasmine, so I’m returning it.”

I’m astonished when he reluctantly removes the new chain. He has fixed it for me.

“Kaid, did you know about flower language?”
“……In the past, my lady asked me to attach the blooming flower in the garden to something…… so I studied it. Although, afterwards, I had no interest further than studying about whether it was poisonous or not, whether it would bear fruit later on or not, and if it would taste bad.”
“I-it’s not like I meant the meaning of all flowers.”
“I knew that, but a man is someone who will cling to what he receives from his first love, pondering if the flower has any meaning to it or not.”

I thought that a woman was not that different, but I’m cornered all of a sudden.
Kaid looks up at my startled face with strange expression.

“My lady?”
“………..First love?”
“That’s right, though?”
“……I didn’t know that.”
“I see. Even I, too, didn’t know that my lady was thinking to seduce me. …………Am I allowed? Right now, truly, treating this as my afterlife.”

It’s agonizing, each of his words, spoken cautiously. It’s so full of longing, so much that it hurts.

“Even if it’s not the afterlife, it’s alright, it’s fine now. I’m sorry, I’m fine with it, it’s alright, Kaid.”

I draw his face with both hands as his golden eyes widely open.

“I love you.”

I yearn for you.
You are my precious.

“I want to live, with you.”

I lost my home, parting with my family, losing sight of myself.
Even so, this love is the only thing I won’t let disappear.

 

 

“I want to know about a lot of things. About other towns, other villages, about the town where you can gather that delicious tea. This time, I’m going to see a lot of things, know a lot of things, I want to live. I want to know about everyone…… and about you, too.”

A drop of tear stains his cheek. The tear that falls from his wide-opened golden eyes traces over his cheek, then drops from his jaw. And then, following the same path, my tears also overflow, bouncing off the ground.
I open my mouth, thinking to say something, but I close the trembling lips again.
It’s the first time I ever see a grown-up man crying. Moreover, this is the first time I see someone with overflowing tears without even noticing it.

“Don’t cry, Kaid.”
“……You’re crying too, my lady.”
“That’s true, we’re a match.”

Bumping our foreheads, we chuckle together.

“……My lady, I will, become 30 soon, do you mind it?”
“An older man is good.”
“……Does that mean a younger man isn’t good?”
“……You, have quite the troublesome personality, don’t you?”

I burst in laughter at Kaid’s childish pout. Since I think of this soon-to-be 30 years old man as someone irresistibly cute, love is truly a troublesome thing. And, as I expected, it’s a wonderful thing.
Kaid, whose face grows constrained from being laughed at, is so charming, so lovely, that I want to do something that I couldn’t do in the past due to embarrassment.
His face that overlooks me is already wonderfully close, looking confused, so I’m moving to take his lips.

“Y-you can’t, my lady. There’s poison,”
“What are you saying now, when you’ve already given me mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?”
“……That’s, well, true, but…………. You said it while blushing,”
“That’s because you stopped me…… and aren’t you blushing too? Aren’t you, like, what, thirty?”
“Almost, but not yet…… Please, stop. A man’s complicated first love isn’t something to be teased.”
“But I’m a woman who also experienced a complicated first love, so we’re a match.”

Kaid casts his eyes downward, one hand on my lips and his other hand covering his own face. From the gaps of his fingers, I can see him making a—is it a moan or groan—no, I can’t even tell if it’s a voice or sound in the first place.

“……So that’s it, that’s the way.”

After sighing so deep that it seems his lungs become empty from it, Kaid lifts his head up.

“I’m going to say this because you don’t seem to have any self-awareness, but under the basis of a sheltered girl’s purity, innocence, and immaturity, along with an aristocratic magnanimity, natural disposition of sincerity, and gentleness being generously displayed, radiating them to your servants without any discrimination, the servants felt complicated. I was unable to say this, but for the sake of making the end as the end, the servants who was intimate with you, my lady, were all feeling complicated. Just please, know that none of this was any of their faults only.”

I don’t understand the point of what Kaid wants to say, but for the time being, I do understand when he called me a sheltered girl. For now, I think it’s better to wait until he says everything he wants to say to the end. Obediently waiting him to continue, Kaid wraps my cheeks with both of his hands. He’s doing the same thing I did to him just now.

“It was always on my mind, but, if strength was added to those, you would have become an unbelievable witch. Looking at you now, your family was doing the right thing to shelter you.”
“What do you mean……? Is it about me being called as the Witch of Laius? Not as Fruitless-Bearing Flower?”
“Please stop radiating to that scale. Please, show them only to me.”
“……Just to Kaid………… Did you just tell me to become the Wolf’s Witch? To be the demon?”

I wonder if it was because how presumptuous of me to be compared to a flower. As much as I don’t think that I was being so hated to the extent of condemning me a new nickname posthumously, I meant to understand Kaid’s feelings, but as I thought, I don’t get what he’s trying to say, at all.
I told him the gist of it, and Kaid groans again.

“……I’m saying that even if you live in the street, my lady is indeed my lady.”
“………..And that means?”

That golden color is getting closer.

“That means, I wonder if I’ll be feeling complicated throughout my whole life.”

The contact only lasted for a split second, but to be able to make me feel this euphoric, love is really troublesome.
And even that troublesome-ness is precious. Even more than that, he’s precious. This feeling that’s neither yearning or love, emptiness or misery, sorrow or joy gushes forth from my chest, and yet it’s also all of them mixed together. It becomes tears that fall from our eyes, that we see in each other, that neither of us notices in ourselves.


RAWS by Morino Ion

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Translator’s Notes: 

First of all, my heartfelt thanks to the translator, kudarajin. I love this series at the first sight so much and the translation is so, so good that only elevates the enjoyment of reading it. If this chapter gets published by me (isecai.wordpress.com), that means three months have passed without any news or reply from them.

The thing is, I feel that reading in Japanese is too much effort for only understanding it for myself, so I don’t read anything I don’t translate. Hence this translation. I’m keeping the format as close as possible to the original, unlike the usual format. I do hope that I can come close to the emotions depicted in the source material.

Notes about the changes:

  • Shirley’s name stays and minor characters’ names stay.
  • Kaid’s stays. I prefer Caid, but I’ll leave it for the sake of uniformity.
  • Isadora –> Isidore
  • I forgot the original names of the regions. So aside from Laius and Darich, there might be changes (Kayna, Kolkia, Gimmi, etc.?)
  • Resurrection festival is written in the same kanji as Easter, but I prefer it this way.
  • The titles of the chapters are altered from kudarajin’s teaser titles.

10,000+ characters. I’m so done.

The Wolf Lord’s Lady

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Author: Tagami Ion (田上伊音)

Synopsis: (by kudarajin)

The previous lords have committed as many atrocities as possible to fill their bellies. I, the only daughter of that house, had discovered that my servant and lover was a spy.
And as the people wanted, my life ended with my execution.

However, with the memory of getting beheaded intact, I began a new life. I was planning to shoulder the sins of my past life and become a nun, but by some trick of fate, I came to work as a maid for the current lord.
Under my former lover, whose name, age and even hair colour were all lies.

Genre: Romance

Raw link: http://ncode.syosetu.com/n9511dh/

~ ? ~

Vol. I

  1. Ending like that, you and me. (by kudarajin)
  2. Beginning for some reason, you and me. (by kudarajin)
  3. Your candy and me. (by kudarajin)
  4. The past days of you and me. (by kudarajin)
  5. The workplace of you and me. (by kudarajin)
  6. The toast of you and me. (by kudarajin)
  7. Preparing to go out, you and me. (by kudarajin)
  8. The guest of you and me. (by kudarajin)
  9. Your friend and me. (by kudarajin)
  10. The waiting period of you and me. (by kudarajin)
  11. The farewell, of you and me. — I (by kudarajin)
  12. The farewell, of you and me. — II (by kudarajin)
  13. The farewell, of you and me. — III (by kudarajin)
  14. The farewell, of you and me. — IV (by kudarajin)
  15. You and me, our, (by kudarajin)
  16. You and me and, (by kudarajin)
  17. The afterlife, of you and me. ?
  18. You, me, and the world’s rule ?
  19. The return of you and me. ?
  20. Thus it begins, you and me. ?

Vol. II

 

(LN) Illustrations

Vol. 1
Vol. 2